Melissa (Missy) Chama is a grieving mother and member of Sacred Sorrows. When asked if we could post this on our blog, she replied: “Anything I can do to alleviate a mother’s heart…I’m there!” Thanks, Missy - for sharing your own heart in this beautifully written poem.
People say that grief comes in waves… sometimes you feel fine and others not. I knew that I couldn’t surf in those waves by myself. God was there patiently waiting for me to let Him in. He was watching from afar respectfully when I didn’t want Him nearby. I have learned to dance in the rain and surf through waves knowing that I’m never alone. God, My Lady of Guadalupe and my beautiful angels are watching over me.
Time to Let Go
After trying to conceive again with no luck,
Maybe it was time to let go first,
Maybe that is all God wanted all this time
For me to let go and a new blessing would come.
When I lost you both, I put everything in a beautiful box,
Pregnancy test, baby yarns, medical paperwork.
Anything that I could gather
to have something of you.
Something that I can hold tight when I’m missing you.
All my feelings are hidden because it’s just too hard to feel.
It’s so hard to let go.
All I know is that it’s too painful,
I don’t know if I will succeed.
I guess this is what people call grieving
and I’m here… grieving my biggest losses!
Going back to the day I lost you
And seeing all the broken pieces of my heart
Made me realize that I need to let go of what happened.
But don’t worry sweethearts
I will never let go of you,
My Shooting Stars!
Even though you’re not here with me
You are part of this family and you will always be.
In my heart, mind and even in medical records you are there
Forever and ever being part of me.
We have an upcoming Afternoon of Reflection & Remembrance (free) in Los Altos, CA, on January 28th, a Mother's Love & Loss Retreat in Tucson, AZ, on February 1st, and another Mother's Love & Loss Retreat in Los Altos, CA, on April 4th.