My love, my loss,
my sacred sorrow...
"No one ever told me that grief felt so like
fear. I am not afraid, but the sensation is like being afraid. The same fluttering in the stomach, the same restlessness, the yawning. I keep on swallowing.
At other times it feels like being mildly drunk, or concussed. There is a sort of invisible blanket between the world and me. I find it hard to take in what anyone says. Or perhaps, hard to want to take it in. It is so uninteresting. Yet I want the others to be about me. I dread the moments when the house is empty. If only they would talk to one another and not to me."
C.S. Lewis - A Grief Observed
About that "God" thing...
Whether you’re feeling faithful, hateful, doubtful, or too-tired-to-even-know-ful, you’re welcome here at Sacred Sorrows. Meeting you exactly where you are is what we do. That said, our starting point (because we really do have to start somewhere) is based in a foundation of traditional beliefs.
In other words: that Creator of the universe called “God".
Or, if you prefer:
Love, Grace, Presence, Holiness, Hashem, Higher Power, Father, Mother, Jehovah, Truth, Beauty, Great Spirit, (the list goes on).
So wherever you are, whatever you feel, whenever you're ready, please join us to encounter the peace that surpasses all understanding, and find the healing that's bigger than any belief system.
For the sake of semantics (and a few other reasons), we refer to the highest power in the universe as God, and we’re not embarrassed to talk about Him
(or Her, if that’s where you’re at).
Welcome. Engage. And if you’re in the "doubtful" camp,
try to be ok with the God thing - it’s a Good thing.
Immense. Frightening. Powerful. Where deep calls to deep.
At the risk of ridicule by those who are not "one of us," I offer a two-word plea in the audio below. It's not the be-all or end-all. It's not even close to a simple answer to
all your troubles. And it's certainly not a substitute for professional help. It's also very different from the rest of the audios on this site (please listen to those too).
But it is a balm. A potential relief for deeply unsettled moments. It definitely helped me. And I hope it helps you too.
If you’re a grieving mother or grandmother, you’ll think: "I hear you". You’ll understand my two words.
If you’re a supportive friend or family member of ours, it may be hard to understand. Please try to understand. Because we need you.
Listen gently please.
Trust that grace will lead you.
It will help you establish a new path for your life, and new ways to express your gifts.
The Medicine of Mourning
The medicine of mourning
There is grief, and there is mourning, and they are not the same. Both are hard in their own ways, but mourning can be a sweet medicine, a soothing balm that, little by little, helps us integrate our loss, and find new meaning in our lives.
We can't stop grief and we wouldn't want to. "The only way out is through", some say, and that may be true.
Grief can be described as all the feelings that are inside of us. All the pain, the suffering, the sadness, the anger, the overwhelm. It can be a beast - intense at times, subtle at others, completely unpredictable. It comes in waves - often like a tsunami. Grieving is a natural, albeit painful, process.
Mourning, on the other hand, is not so natural. It takes some effort but the rewards are great. Mourning is the myriad of things we can do with our grief. We all engage in mourning differently, unique to our own personalities. Some examples include: journaling, putting pictures of our loved ones on a special wall or area in our home, planting a tree or garden, visiting a cemetery or a place in nature, or lighting a candle at commemorative times. Everyone’s path is different, and the ways that we mourn are as numerous as the grains of sand on a beach.
Little by little, our simple acts of mourning can move us into new ways of thinking and being. Mourning doesn't replace grief, but it adds to it in a way that makes our loss bearable, and often, meaningful. Mourning is medicine for our souls. Join our community, visit the forum, start giving yourself some good medicine.